School day

A white professor said 'nigger' in class today. He was directly quoting Malcolm X; something that Malcolm X said against the use of the word 'nigger'. An African American student stood up. She made a huge commotion while she gathered all of her things. She yelled, "I don't appreciate using that word in class!" She stormed out of the classroom. He didn't know what to say. No one did.

Number of times I've spoken aloud to myself today: 5

My fortune cookie read, "Just do it: Who you might meet along the way"

The corn-fed American waiter at the Chinese restaurant called me "bro" three times in our minute long exchange.

I ordered a Harbin lager after reading a blurb about the creature it was named for. It said that the creature refused to walk on grass or eat another living thing. The beer was advertised as 'The Taste of China', I got the bottle and found out it was brewed in Missouri.

Smug fuck, dumb fuck aging-hipster-professor (he taught me that that sequence would have to be highlighted) squealed when he moved the podium a bit too far and it slid over his toe. His black horn-rimmed glasses slid to the bottom of his nose, and he looked disheveled for the first time all semester. Later in class he said, "you aren't writing this down, therefore it will undoubtedly be wrong when you hand in your assignment."


"There is no place I can eat and feel good here."
"I don't belong here. I don't need anything here."
"She didn't even look at me."
"Is it Tuesday?"
I'm not sure that this counts, but: "I'm sorry." as I closed a door mistakenly before the girl a couple steps behind me could get through.

I discovered today that I had inadvertently started a bathroom graffiti war. Last week I had scribbled a dirty limerick that my grandfather had taught me when I was younger about having to pay for toilets back in the old days. Today, I found out that someone had written 'your a homo' directly underneath it. I responded with 'you spelled "you're" wrong and 'your' paying ten thousand dollars to go to this school.' I am anxious for the reply.