Untitled #14

I start to ignore him
Along with all the others
They probably thought it was some kind of adolescent phase
Young and depressed fits the description, sir

They decide to up my dosage
As I self-medicate following our weekly exchanges
Clear orange containers
Spread out
On cluttered dining room tables
Or anxiously shaking in vintage purses
Below the threshold of the girls' bathroom
Upon all our sorted entrances

The new friends I make
All start to look the same
As time passes,
And the stained sheets are crumbled into balls
Before being secretely thrown into the wash
Between 3:30 and 5:00 o'clock P.M.

She eventually finds out about the randomness
But keeps it to herself for awhile
Expecting the best
A new bright version of me
Upon my multiple returns home
To the guest room

By the time I finally say what I need to
I'm already gone for three months
And he's lost again
Buying flip-flops
And everyone else is sure they're doing the right thing

I lose the strength to convince them otherwise
We've always been seasoned pros
At denying honesty
For simplistic pleasures
And programmed escapes
Seats and tray tables
Locked,
In place

-C.W.