Wednesday, October 24, 2007

To H Donald

Keep your head up. I know it's tough to do simetimes, but it's the only thing we can do, you know? I almost gave up a lot of times when I was really young. I woke up every morning and I didn't want to get outta the bed. When I finally did I would just go to work at the grocery store and then after I would go to my friends' house. We would all drink a lot, that's just what we did. I would talk about how everyone at the store was so demeaning to me and how they would roll their eyes sometimes. I would get so drunk that I would have to be carried home most times. I kept hoping that I would drink so much that I wouldn't wake up the next day. I iintentionally tried to do that a couple times.
Then I got pregnant. It was just to some guy, Dennis. He had big shoulders that I loved. He told me the things that a teenage girl like me needed to hear, about how he was going to take care of me and I wouldn't have to worry about the things I was worrying about. Then one day, I went over to his apartment and he wasn't there. His landlord said she didn't know where he went. I haven't heard a word from him. I was scared at first, I didn't know who to turn to. I didn;t know how was I was going to raise him, but when he came into this world, it changed me. That was 20 years ago this December. And now I can't imagine my life being any different. I was happy after having Paul. It was hard doing it on my own, but he's a good boy and never gave me much trouble. He's moved to Pittsburgh now, going to college at Chatham on a partial scholarship for film. He loves movies. I really miss him being around, but I'm so proud of him.
I guess I';m just trying to say that it's not all bad. There are peaks and valleys on the wave that our life is on, and we just have to ride them out. Having Paul changed my life, and something like that can change yours, too. Don't be sad lol, your life can change for the better in an instant. You don't have to be lonely, because there are people all around you. and they all want to see you smile, I know I do :)

1 comment:

My Idea of Fun said...

Thank you for your consideration. Good luck to Paul!

- H.