Monday, July 20, 2009

Everybody's Wrecked on Main Street.

Only three times in his life had Jason ever seen his father cry. These instances occured at his daughter's death, his own father's death, and this very particular moment, to which Jason couldn't, and still can't completely fathom. The delusional rantings coming out of his mouth were a bit more than just slightly frightening. This day, he'd spent contemplating any possible turn of events which may have come out in the favor of the family. Things were not looking too good.

There was his mother, whom had stopped answering the phone hours ago, and was out driving around town, after making several suicide threats, declaring "I'm at fault for everything... I can't do anything right," in her most frustrated tone. Then there was Jason's brother, Felix, to whom was both exhausted, and fighting his own battle at the moment, to whom called telling Jason to come stay at his house in the midst of the chaos. "Trust me bro, this isn't your battle." Felix said over a brief phone conversation. "No, but what happens if I'm not here?" Jason replied.

"Maybe he'll see that nobody needs this bullshit."

So the day all built up, with all the world speaking to him, saying, "Jason, today will be awful. Accept it." And thus he did. Sitting quietly at his computer chair, recollecting, and awaiting the turn of events, Jason sat down and began to type. It was incomprehensible to him whether he was typing actual logic, or just details that couldn't entirely be pieced together... all the tears, all the insanity, all the selfishness, and hopes and dreams, and wants of a family that was finally falling to pieces.

The sick part was that deep down, all that Jason could think was, "it's about fucking time."

The old man had been threatening it for years, that he was leaving, that he couldn't take it anymore. Always ignoring the stipulations... always ignoring the fact that each bill left unpaid was left unpaid by both of them, and not just by his "Ritztown garbage slut of a wife," as he'd so often called her.

5:00 PM hit, and Jason's mother, in tears, hardly audible, declared, "I'm leaving and you can't come with." Jason argued for a few moments, hiding the fear in his eyes of the notion that his mother might not return from this trip. They argued incessantly for a short period of time before she promised him that she wouldn't do anything stupid, and that she just wanted to be alone.

As she drove off, he pulled up; Jason's father arrived home from work finally. He came in, and immediately raised his voice. "You couldn't even stop her from leaving? If she doesn't come back, you killed her boy." He mumbled, adding shortly after "everyone in this family's so fucking dependable."

At this point, Jason would take no more of this. He simply stated, "fuck you old man, you'll die alone," very calmly, then casually stepped out the door. The tears didn't begin til he was halfway down the block. On the walk, he was sure that nature was speaking to him. The area was overcast, and ugly, with a bit of wind, and occassional, large drops of rain falling on top of his head. Mother Nature was telling Jason to get bent.

After some time, he decided to return, fearing that this may be the last time he speak to his father. Upon entering the door, his father glanced at him for a moment, then went upstairs to continue packing. Twenty minutes later, he returned downstairs with a bag in each hand, stuck his head into the living room, and muttered, "i love you son. goodbye"


My Idea of Fun said...

"Mother nature was telling him to get bent" - This sentence rules, really makes everything that much better.

c said...

thanks. when I re-read this rant, I didn't remember stating it like that, and I was actually pleased with the line myself when i read it.

My Idea of Fun said...

that line was cool, but i think this whole little story rules.

c said...

thank you much. it was more of a mad ranting