Saturday, December 24, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Monday, December 19, 2011
12/20 at VOMA
Tuesday, December 20th
307 Chestnut Street, Johnstown, PA 15906☟
7:00 PM // $4.00
BYOB if you are 21+
Roberto Clemente Rookie Card and My Idea of Fun Present:
Casino Gardens (Ohio)
- http://beerontherug.bandcamp.com/album/casino-gardens
- http://vimeo.com/22182915
World Series (Ohio)
- http://beerontherug.bandcamp.com/album/episodes-of-el-ni-o
- http://vimeo.com/23832604
The One and Only Matt Miller (Johnstown, Pennsylvania)
- http://www.myideaoffun.org/MattMiller/
- http://theviennanoisechoir.bandcamp.com/track/dreaming-collective-ly
NYKDLN (Johnstown, Pennsylvania)
- www.myideaoffun.org/NYKDLN/
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxLeVtYVuZo
AL GRATIN (Johnstown, Pennsylvania)
- http://strayfrankz.tumblr.com/post/392144975/al-gratin-teenage-heartbreak-and-90s-noise-rock
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8_xIRYzGqI&feature=related
+ live sound and visual installations
+ an extensive catalog of physical merchandise will be available
+ this show will be have a live online video stream
- http://robertoclementerookiecard.blogspot.com/
- http://www.myideaoffun.org/
Sunday, December 18, 2011
How the Cordless Phone Gained Independence through Hard Work & Determination
The onion tells a sad, sad story--
A man walks into a bar,
orders a cup overflowing
with his own medicine.
Whose job is it to sever
the rabbit's foot? he asks.
The butcher, as innocent
as a sweater. Scissors
remind him of his ex-girlfriend.
In the corner booth
the Freudian analyzes
his patient's inner thighs,
frustrated as the tack--
People are introduced
to themselves in dimmer light
thinks the man, approaching
a woman as she exits the bathroom,
a slight cup of water,
(the name of the paler sister)
her dimpled thighs carefully spackled.
When she prays, the windows
get foggy. Wait, wait--
I know this one!
They looked at each other
& laughed--they'd both
cut off the tip of their tongue.
A man walks into a bar,
orders a cup overflowing
with his own medicine.
Whose job is it to sever
the rabbit's foot? he asks.
The butcher, as innocent
as a sweater. Scissors
remind him of his ex-girlfriend.
In the corner booth
the Freudian analyzes
his patient's inner thighs,
frustrated as the tack--
People are introduced
to themselves in dimmer light
thinks the man, approaching
a woman as she exits the bathroom,
a slight cup of water,
(the name of the paler sister)
her dimpled thighs carefully spackled.
When she prays, the windows
get foggy. Wait, wait--
I know this one!
They looked at each other
& laughed--they'd both
cut off the tip of their tongue.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Today's Activity: Giving the Clouds Hebrew Names
The priest gave me a towel
to sit on so I wouldn't
burn the pew. If I plug
myself into the wall, I told him,
this whole place will come down
in flickering ashes. I confessed
to digging without purpose,
lifting with my lower back.
My punishment: the uncertainty
of a light switch, the haze
of the underside of the bed.
Fifty more days of winter.
I didn't even tell him
about the thirst for broken
bottles, the constant alarm.
I rub my forehead against the carpet
for forgiveness, resolve to put
the thermostat to rest, to keep cool
like the shell of a cockroach.
If you ask me, the priest
is just afraid of commitment.
to sit on so I wouldn't
burn the pew. If I plug
myself into the wall, I told him,
this whole place will come down
in flickering ashes. I confessed
to digging without purpose,
lifting with my lower back.
My punishment: the uncertainty
of a light switch, the haze
of the underside of the bed.
Fifty more days of winter.
I didn't even tell him
about the thirst for broken
bottles, the constant alarm.
I rub my forehead against the carpet
for forgiveness, resolve to put
the thermostat to rest, to keep cool
like the shell of a cockroach.
If you ask me, the priest
is just afraid of commitment.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Friday, December 9, 2011
How We All Just Get Along
The waitress puts a rusty nail
in your roast beef sandwich
& you decided to eat around it.
From all over town, people misdail
your phone number looking for Brad,
the listener, as advertised on page six.
Now the cat answers to your name
instead of her own. Your husband watches
hockey all day, so you buy another
television for the living room.
Your daughter gets sick trying
to watch them at the same time.
The pipe's uncontrollable sobbing,
the power strip's panic attack--
then, the house you build next
door. In your first life, you were
a pillar of salt. Open the cupboard
doors. There's something dying in there.
in your roast beef sandwich
& you decided to eat around it.
From all over town, people misdail
your phone number looking for Brad,
the listener, as advertised on page six.
Now the cat answers to your name
instead of her own. Your husband watches
hockey all day, so you buy another
television for the living room.
Your daughter gets sick trying
to watch them at the same time.
The pipe's uncontrollable sobbing,
the power strip's panic attack--
then, the house you build next
door. In your first life, you were
a pillar of salt. Open the cupboard
doors. There's something dying in there.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Wake Me When It's Over
An old woman peers into the crack
in her paved driveway
and finds exactly what she was looking for.
in her paved driveway
and finds exactly what she was looking for.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Gucci Goth
Mazes to the Motherlode by Brandon Locher is featured today on Gucci Goth! http://guccigoth.tumblr.com
At the End of the World Party
They were checking gag reflexes
at the door. Marian wasn't allowed in
after her eyes started to water.
The bar serving free cocktails,
my mouth turning blue, my teeth heavy
and ready to call bullshit.
That familiar battle between
my ears: Tell someone you've left
the bathwater running, how flammable
are you on a scale of one to ten?
I tried to look at both sides
of the room at the same time
but my left eye refused to wander.
I was the sharp-edged trumpet
in a room full of chairs
teaching each other how to sit.
A loud song that should have
made everyone dance--instead,
the mumble of weather-talk, lazy
attempt at predicting the future.
Then, hot breath on the side
of my face: What happens to your heart
when the bass kicks in and how do we know?
at the door. Marian wasn't allowed in
after her eyes started to water.
The bar serving free cocktails,
my mouth turning blue, my teeth heavy
and ready to call bullshit.
That familiar battle between
my ears: Tell someone you've left
the bathwater running, how flammable
are you on a scale of one to ten?
I tried to look at both sides
of the room at the same time
but my left eye refused to wander.
I was the sharp-edged trumpet
in a room full of chairs
teaching each other how to sit.
A loud song that should have
made everyone dance--instead,
the mumble of weather-talk, lazy
attempt at predicting the future.
Then, hot breath on the side
of my face: What happens to your heart
when the bass kicks in and how do we know?
Monday, December 5, 2011
Whitest House
The connection between
disparate thoughts
the public speaker said,
then left the room--
bees strung by
needle and thread.
Zeus could not contain
his anxiety. He was
drinking tea made
from the jawbones of calves.
The result of endless
suffering, the prostitute
whispered to my grandmother.
It is the nature of men,
compressed as icicles.
Outside, a group of
schoolboys has three wishes:
Urine on the front lawn. Our
president has perfect eyesight.
A girl in a pink unitard
climbs out the window.
So many choices for god and man!
The "g" on every keyboard removed.
disparate thoughts
the public speaker said,
then left the room--
bees strung by
needle and thread.
Zeus could not contain
his anxiety. He was
drinking tea made
from the jawbones of calves.
The result of endless
suffering, the prostitute
whispered to my grandmother.
It is the nature of men,
compressed as icicles.
Outside, a group of
schoolboys has three wishes:
Urine on the front lawn. Our
president has perfect eyesight.
A girl in a pink unitard
climbs out the window.
So many choices for god and man!
The "g" on every keyboard removed.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Something Like a Small Miracle
The boys in the back alley
are playing baseball
but they're not keeping score
so no one wins and there's no ball
and no home plate and they're just standing
in their uncomfortable shoes. Had they
been born with sharp teeth,
they would have blunted them
but now like a thumb. Of course
they'd rather slip down the drain
pipe and curse and scream until
the sewage backs up and baptizes itself.
Before the streetlights turn on
they've decided to think about something flat
or a rock sinking in a shallow pool
but instead they're kissing,
swallowing each other's sparks.
are playing baseball
but they're not keeping score
so no one wins and there's no ball
and no home plate and they're just standing
in their uncomfortable shoes. Had they
been born with sharp teeth,
they would have blunted them
but now like a thumb. Of course
they'd rather slip down the drain
pipe and curse and scream until
the sewage backs up and baptizes itself.
Before the streetlights turn on
they've decided to think about something flat
or a rock sinking in a shallow pool
but instead they're kissing,
swallowing each other's sparks.
How to Draw the Saint
First, wait for the divine image.
This may come as someone's
body odor or a sudden leaning
at the forehead. If that doesn't work,
put salt on your tongue and count
the seconds till it dissolves.
Then try various perspectives
and qualities of light.
Immediately following, hold
a dry cloth in your mouth--
the prophet particularly detested
saliva in excess. When you being
to lose feeling at the back of your knees
like Job you'll understand finally
the sweat on her cheek when even
the saint confesses her raucous prayers.
This may come as someone's
body odor or a sudden leaning
at the forehead. If that doesn't work,
put salt on your tongue and count
the seconds till it dissolves.
Then try various perspectives
and qualities of light.
Immediately following, hold
a dry cloth in your mouth--
the prophet particularly detested
saliva in excess. When you being
to lose feeling at the back of your knees
like Job you'll understand finally
the sweat on her cheek when even
the saint confesses her raucous prayers.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Another Tragedy at the Salon
The chatty hairdresser
accidentally mentions
God. Her co-workers
being to weep. A gust from the air
conditioner picks up hair from the floor.
The elderly woman's scalp
starts to burn. A crowd
gathers in front of the door.
The hairdresser looks
in the mirror & sees her eyes
stuck with scissors.
She takes her own hair
into her hands in sections
& snip, snip.
accidentally mentions
God. Her co-workers
being to weep. A gust from the air
conditioner picks up hair from the floor.
The elderly woman's scalp
starts to burn. A crowd
gathers in front of the door.
The hairdresser looks
in the mirror & sees her eyes
stuck with scissors.
She takes her own hair
into her hands in sections
& snip, snip.
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